Of all the performance-enhancing drugs banned by the NFL, the one most critical to daily life remains legal: Sweet, necessary coffee.
It's sensible to assume that this elixir of life, this purveyor of productivity, is on the breakfast table of every NFL player -- nay, any balanced adult facing a long day of to-do lists and other responsibilities. So maybe it's a mark of Tom Brady's privilege that the quarterback insists he's never had one drop of the stuff.
Thanks to a feature from The Boston Globe, we've learned a lot about Brady's eating habits, including the revelation that he doesn't consume caffeine.
Abstaining from the stimulant is one thing, but to have never once consumed coffee is something else entirely -- especially for a quarterback who's made his home in Boston, where Dunkin' Donuts is king.
"I never had any coffee or anything like that," Brady explained to WEEI on Monday. "I just never tried it."
And apparently he doesn't have a craving for it, either. It's just another way Brady manages to separate himself from the peasantry, all of us toiling away and living day-to-day on the strength of our coffee IV drip.
He does have an Achilles heel when it does come to diet, though. When asked what tempts him to break his very structured diet, he admitted a couple weaknesses.
"Probably burgers or ice cream," he said.