I'm so mean I make medicine sick.

- Muhammad Ali

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It was a boring game. Next year they're talking about bringing in Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.

- David Letterman, on Seahawks-Broncos Super Bowl

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I am not very smart, but I recognize that I am not very smart.

- Woody Hayes

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Absorb what is useful. Discard what is not. Add what is uniquely your own.

- Bruce Lee

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What a player does best, he should practice least. Practice is for problems.

- Duke Snider

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It's gotten so bad, even Tim Tebow was like, "If they call, I am not here.

- Jimmy Fallon, on the Giants' 0-6 start

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Do not pray for an easy life. Pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.

- Bruce Lee

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He's going to teach them the key strategy that always worked for him: Pass the ball to Michael Jordan.

- Jimmy Fallon, on Dennis Rodman's interest in coaching the North Korean Olympic team

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He could hit better with a broken arm than we could with two good arms.

- Jerry Coleman, on Ted Williams

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Players are being told not to show off too much after a touchdown, a sack or a murder.

- Conan O'Brien, on NFL crackdown of excessive celebration

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