Mo Williams
"Dirk is the best 7 footer ever that don't have to dunk 1 time to dominate."
How I See It: What Mo fails to mention is that Dirk is the only man in that category.

Jason Heyward
"just sit back and watch how long the diamonds can keep their shine. though... @FeatherOnMyBack"
How I See It: I guess that is one way to spend your days as you recover from the pain that has kept you off the baseball diamond.

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Michael Huff
"Ich weiß nicht, Deutsch, aber ich wollte nur sagen, irgendwas auf Deutsch gehen dirk"
How I See It: Before you begin to think that Michael Huff has some sort of love for German, here is the translation, "I do not know German, but I just wanted to say something in German to Dirk."

Andre Ward
"Lebron ain't ready Heat fans. #Kobe"
How I See It: Should somebody tell him that Kobe and his Lakers are no longer in the playoffs, or should we let him continue living in his fantasy world?

Patrick McEnroe
"I think my favorite Dirk tennis comparison so far is Michael Stich. And not because he's German. Cuz of his style and feel!!!"
How I See It: Are you sure it's not just because he's German? Dirk might not be Larry Bird, but I think he deserves better than being compared to a tennis player who only won one Grand Slam tournament.

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Amar'e Stoudemire
"LA, is for sure one of the top city's in the world, i had a blast. Filming Entourage was a gr8 accomplishment. #blessed #TeamSTAT"
How I See It: Ari Gold for Knicks' new President/GM?

Tiger Woods
"Not playing in US Open. Very disappointed. Short-term frustration for long-term gain."
How I See It: NBC just lost 75 percent of its U.S. Open sponsors.

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Anthony Morrow
"I thank God for this game"
How I See It: Definitely.

Kerry Rhodes
"Yes sir!!! Big win Mavs! I'm pumped over here! Thx for all my people that bet with me! Thx 4 doing business!"
How I See It: Why isn't Pete Rose in the Hall of Fame again?

John Daly
"Y'all can order this new print "Thunderbolt" in sport coat, shorts & slacks! Get em at johndaly.com http://lockerz.com/s/108707982"
How I See It: Doesn't John Daly vaguely remind you of the real life Johnny Bravo?

Mike Tyson
"Follow Mr. Chow (@kenjeong)"
How I See It: And what if I don't? Oh right, this will happen.

Damien Woody
"Yea it's pretty obvious that @KingJames is the most hated athlete.....but why?"
How I See It: I have no idea. Ask @Dan Gilbert.

Herculez Gomez
"About to watch USA vs Canada at PF Changs in GUAD... This is the way to be introduced to your new city. I likes already.)"
How I See It: How? By watching your national team play without you while eating chain Chinese food. Sounds great.

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Scottie Pippen
"Congrats to @SHAQ on a Hall of Fame career. He is truly one of the game's most dominant big men to ever play."
How I See It: You're allowed to say he's a better big man than Bill Cartwright or Will Perdue. That's acceptable.

CC Sabathia
"Check out Photos with CC and Joba from Yesterday's NVLL Spring Classic! http://fb.me/Mir7At6n"
How I See It: CC and Joba are living the high life this year as the second and third heaviest pitchers on the Yankees. @BartoloColon.

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Mark Sanchez
"Burger joint http://twitpic.com/572jp3"
How I See It: Good observation, Mark.

Mo Williams
"Welcome home Plaxico Burress. We the 49ers will welcome u with open arms. Good luck"
How I See It: So, in other words, the non-imprisoned world is Plaxico Burress' home? And who are you to talk on behalf of the 49ers?

John Calipari
"Enjoyed a great week at SEC Meetings at the @HiltonSandestin. We had some great discussions."
How I See It: About what? How quiet that meetings were without Bruce Pearl?

Allan Houston
"Trust the Lord w all our heart..acknowledge Him in all our ways..then He'll make our paths straight."
How I See It: Bible Commentary: Thank God Donnie Walsh is out. Now I have a clear path to the GM job.

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Dara Torres
"Got bitten by sea lice (again) 2day (ud think I'd learn by now!). Used vinegar this time...T asked why I smelled like salad dressing, ha!"
How I See It: Is that just the cute name you gave leeches?

Lolo Jones
"I just did one ab crunch. Gotta stay tight"
How I See It: I guarantee you that single crunch did absolutely nothing to improve your overall fitness and physique.

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Renee Montgomery
"Wade is making sure we know he's Batman during the finals.... Forget being a sidekick"
How I See It: I wonder how LeBron feels about his Robin suit ...

JaVale McGee
"Is there an America town in china? #pierresquestionoftheday"
How I See It: Yeah, it's where they sell hamburgers and MLB apparel.

Ashley Battle
"i feel like dwade has like 30pts"
How I See It: Don’t guess. Check a box score will ya!?

Luol Deng
"A few kids just stopped by my house and invited me to surprise their brother at his high school graduation party. On my way now."
How I See It: You sound like Vinny Chase from that episode of "Entourage."

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Kenny Wallace
"Oh boy this is Fun Fun!..trying to pickup my family at Ohare in Chicago Airport, Security chasing me from parking spot:)"
How I See It: Do I smell sarcasm here? Anyway, Kenny, you've got to expect consequences when you pull in above the speed limit; it's just like pit road.

Joel Hanrahan
"Tough finish today, whacky game, but still a #winning Roadtrip, can't wait to get back to the burgh for the battle of PA #battlingbuccos"
How I See It: This may be the first time in recorded history that someone has said that he can't wait to get back to Pittsburgh. Maybe his opinion will change after they get creamed in "the battle of PA."

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Chad Ochocinco
"Nah i was really on a bicycle RT @ChrisFourLane: did i tel yall i seen @ochocinco in southbeach on a #bike ...... or was i drunk/wasted"
How I See It: Training for your next stunt, I assume? Better work hard, the Tour de France begins in a month.

Greg Anthony
"DEEEAAAAAMMMMMNNNN @KingJames”
How I See It: That's the kind of in-depth analysis Greg Anthony gets paid for. Still, that truly summed up several of James' plays Thursday.

Graeme McDowell
"Lose not loose. Its a grammar thing RT @Frank_Bear @54_and_Counting you only loose an accent if you want too. It's an ego thing."
How I See It: I'm glad to see that McDowell has picked up the critical, knit-picky attitude that Twitter is all about. And then he forgets an apostrophe. Classic.

Patrick Patterson
"When I cry.. You cry.. We cry.. Together. #teammotto”
How I See It: It makes perfect sense that the Houston Rockets' team motto would address how they react after a loss rather than how to win.

Jay Feely
"You did, but you're still losing RT @mmreuth just nailed @jayfeely with an 83 pointer in wordswithfriends...”
How I See It: This week's installment of how NFL players are passing time during the lockout brought to you by Jay Feely.

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