Tracy McGrady
"#honestyhour I aint done#unfinishedbusiness"
How I See It: Yes, you are done. And you have no business to finish.

Alana Beard
"God is good...All the time! Got the WORD"
How I See It: Tell that to a Cubs fan. See if they think the same way.

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Chad Ochocinco
"Chad johnson RT @Fillin TheBlank: ____ is an a******!"
How I See It: Looks like somebody forgot they changed their name to two numbers in Spanish.

Steve Breaston
How I See It: This tweet sure isn't.

Amir Khan
"On route with primetime to eat, goin to Famous Grill in Bell CA
How I See It: I've heard of that place.

Beanie Wells
"Feels good to be back! 1 week in ohio was long enough.
How I See It: Try 25 years. Sincerely, LeBron James.

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Apolo Ohno
How I See It: For what? Do you actually have things to do in between every Winter Olympics?

Jonathan Vilma
"Mom called, said its passed my bedtime so I'm out lol"
How I See It: Jonathan Vilma's mom for next Campbell's Chunky Noodle Soup commercial.

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Eric Wright
"Some ppl are just so clueless.."
How I See It: Don't worry, the NFL is working every day to fix the league's concussion problems.

AJ Hawk
"Got a new dog"
How I See It: That is definitely not a dog.

Derrick Williams
"Dreams to Reality"
How I See It: Ah, the life of a second overall pick. @darkomilicic @michaelbeasley @marvinwilliams

Greg Monroe
"Get yo panties out a bunch! ?"
How I See It: I thought they teach you respect toward women at a Jesuit institution like Georgetown.

Apolo Ohno
How I See It: For what? Do you actually have things to do in between every Winter Olympics?

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Lolo Jones
"Gutted. I'd rather have someone stabbed (sic) me in the leg 5 times than experience the pain I'm feeling in my heart by not making Team USA"
How I See It: Now that's patriotism!

Marcos Ambrose
"Past Logano, up to 14th on lap 55,on a charge #pr"
How I See It: Mr. Ambrose was quickly stopped and given a ticket for texting while driving.

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Pierre Garcon
"I'm about to go hangout with my man @JasonSpells on WRTV at 5pm tonight. I'm going to try and take his job during this lockout."
How I See It: Will broadcast for food.

Donte' Stallworth
"Wonder how #China #Russia feel w/the increasing military presence by the American empire all around their neighborhood? #ShoeOnTheOtherFoot"
How I See It: #RevisionistHistory

Michael Oher
"I just found out Ole Miss is Ole Miss Rebels.....not the Ole Miss Black Bears!! The mascot is the Black Bear! Lol learn some everyday"
How I See It: The South will rise again!

Zab Judah
"Wow someone hacked my twitter; If you get [weird] dm's from me that's not me"
How I See It: That defense sure worked for Anthony Weiner ...

Fabian Washington
"I'm cooler than a fan and colder than a freezer"
How I See It: "Lockout Schmockout, this writing stuff is easy." Uh huh.

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Plaxico Burress
"By the way, I'm addicted to Garretts Popcorn! The Chicago mix cheddar and caramel! Unreal!!"
How I See It: I suppose it's the little things you appreciate when you finally get out of the slammer.

Nick Barnett
"#no1likesubecause you come to the tailgater and don't bring anything!!!!"
How I See It: It looks like Barnett learned several hard lessons during his first year of tailgating after going on IR.

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Gerald McCoy
"Dang James "Whitey" Bulger just got caught last night. Bulger is Jack Nicholson character in the Departed. I didn't know it was a true story"
How I See It: #duh. Now it should make sense why Bulger was spotted exiting a showing of the film in San Diego when it was released.

George Hill
"Very emotional moment right now!!! But just want to Thank Everyone for all the Support. SA has been great to me and will never forget it!!"
How I See It: Wow, I've never seen someone so graciously handle the news that they are being dragged back to Indiana. #toughluck

Jeff Capel
"Ron Artest has legally changing his name to Metta World Peace!!!! Most exciting news of the night thus far!!!"
How I See It: If only World B. Free had a Twitter account to comment on this news ...

DeJuan Blair
How I See It: It's all right. We'll give you a couple minutes to learn how to pronounce and spell the names of your new teammates from Latvia, Slovenia and Hungary. And don't worry, you'll get used to all these international names if you stay with the Spurs long enough.

Maurice Jones-Drew
"Damn I wish they would have stayed we would be crazy!! #gobruins!!!!!"
How I See It: This coming from a man who left UCLA after his junior year. Now you know how the football fans must have felt when you left.

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Usain Bolt
"TI think some athlete need to get them self a girl so they can get there mind off me still cause my mind is on track, life and ofcourse girls"
How I See It: I think Usain is trying to say that all girls love him, but I'm not really sure. Either way, I'd love to have his life.

John Wall
"Headed to the Nationals game!!!"
How I See It: That went well.

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Dwyane Wade
"Yo.. if yall could have seen the look on @carmeloanthony face.. when I ran up on him out of now where on the streets of Milan..Priceless"
How I See It: Yes, if you would have taken us all to the Armani Show in Milan, that would have been priceless.

Carmelo Anthony
"Armani show was #EPIC"
How I See It: We got it. The show was awesome. Thanks, Dwyane and Carmelo, for reminding us we're not rich professional athletes.

John Isner
"anyone seen the wimby draw? Who do I play?"
How I See It: Very funny. Let's just put it this way: It's going to be a long day. Or two. Or three.

Brandon Phillips
"Good Afternoon #BPFansShawty Look in the sky, It's a bird, it's plane, NOOOOO, it's the SUN!!!! YESSSS FINALLY... Yep I'm lame for that! LOL"
How I See It: Just be glad Bartolo Colon's on the DL. If he was pitching for the Yanks today, you wouldn't get any sun while up at bat.

Amir Johnson
"trust issues"
How I See It: So that was the Raptors' problem this season ...

Brad Gilbert
"had a feeling it would be 3, max 4 sets. Isman starting to take complete control. he'd love to win in straights and get the heck outta here"
How I See It: Oh, really? I thought he wanted another three-day match. My bad.

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Rory McIlroy
"Tastes good!!!"
How I See It: And that's how the (Northern) Irish celebrate.

Jack Nicklaus
"Jack Nicklaus shares his thoughts on Rory McIlroy's record-setting victory in the US Open."
How I See It: So Jack says, "In some ways, I guess I feel almost like a father figure in the game of golf. I consider all these kids like sons of mine." ... Well, all right then, Jack.

Tiger Woods
"Last time I missed a USGA event Salt N Peppa was still cool and Whitehead was a toddler."
How I See It: And Rory McIlroy was 6.

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Luke Donald
"Thinking about moving to Northern Ireland!!"
How I See It: #luckofthenorthern*irish @rorymcilroy @graememcdowell

Graeme McDowell
"RT @Luke_Donald Thinking about moving to Northern Ireland!! >> citizenship refused"
How I See It: Scratch that, Luke.

Bubba Watson
"Nice------------- “@UpperDeckSports: Hey @BubbaWatson, your first Upper Deck cards are set to come out on 6/29. #upperdecktradingcard"
How I See It: Maybe you didn't win this weekend, but I guess that's a plus.

Ian Poulter
"@McIlroyRory went to Haiti last week to see & help the kids, awesome stuff give & it will give you back tenfold. #respect"
How I See It: #goodkarma

Zach Johnson
"Struggled today with the putter.. Struggled even more with a sinus infection. Persevered and finished. #toughday"
How I See It: Yeah, you definitely would have been sixteen under without the sinus infection.

Rickie Fowler
"Bummed out I won't be at the @TravelersChamp this year...tweaked my knee this week & need a week off to reduce inflammation docs orders"
How I See It: American golfers are the biggest bunch of wussies ever. @tigerwoods @zachjohnson

Hunter Mahan
"Off to see the "book of Mormon" broadway show!! Heard it's awesome can't wait to see it!"
How I See It: Did you buy those tickets before or after you missed the cut?

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Reggie Evans
"Do the fathers get a discount on their child support for fathers day?"
How I See It: Nice try, Reggie, but you still have to pay full price.

Eric Wright
"Sumbody got a surprise "Happy Fathers Day" text today and was NOT happy... #MauryIsh"
How I See It: "Sumbody" probably = Eric Wright.

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Matt Barnes
"Hope all the REAL fathers out there, had a blessed fathers day.."
How I See It: As opposed to all of the fake fathers?

Ed Davis
"I'm single"
How I See It: Come and get it!

Kevin Durant
"this is true"
How I See It: The Durantula just lost his man card for giving away trade secrets.

Nick Swisher
"What a series! Huge win for us tonight. Now its off to Cincy!"
How I See It: Yankees > Cubs ... Duh.

Darryl Talley
"The Carfax Car Fox needs 2 b pistol whipped."
How I See It: I just bought a lemon.

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LeBron James
"Happy 4th B-day to my little one Bryce Maximus James!! Love u much and have many more great ones"
How I See It: So you averaged just over half your son's age in the fourth quarter of the Finals. Congrats, man.

Dwyane Wade
"I wanna take ths time & say THANK U 2 all of the Miami heat & My supporters across the country. Nothing but luv & respect 4 all of u.."
How I See It: The Miami Heat have fans? Since when?

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Michael Oher
"#imhappiestwhen the ppl that are close to me are as well! RT"
How I See It: Well, how are Mr. and Mrs. Tuohy doing? And how about Ms. Sue?

Shawne Merriman
"Has anybody watched this show are you smarter than a 5th grader?"
How I See It: No. No one has ever seen it. What do you think?

Anthony Morrow
"Random fact: if u wana find a good woman don't look in the club, go to WalMart"
How I See It: Definitely.

Apolo Ohno
"Jamaican bobsled..... #AmazingStory #WhereISUsainBolt"
How I See It: Someone just watched "Cool Runnings" for the first time.

Desmond Howard
"I was at a dinner with President Obama last night. What an incredible man. Pictures in the AM."
How I See It: nbd.

Ian Poulter
"The funniest youtube clip ever. Hats off to you boys. Love it. @bubbawatson @RickieFowlerPGA Hunter Mahan, Ben Crane"
How I See It: Now imagine Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson, Jim Furyk, and Davis Love III doing that a generation ago.

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Dirk Nowitzki
"We r world champs babyyy. Absolutely amazing. Tanks to all mavs fans across the world. This one is for you guys. Flyin bak home now. Cheers"
How I See It: ... oh, and kiss my butt, LeBron.

Jason Terry
"We played hard and prayed harder its all jesus we coming home dallas"
How I See It: Religion finally makes sense. Karma's a b****.

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Jason Kidd
How I See It: This is so legit..

Mo Williams
"Dallas just healed my HEART........"
How I See It: @cavsdan (Dan Gilbert) #ihatelebronjames

Dan Gilbert
"Congrats to Mark C.&entire Mavs org. Mavs NEVER stopped & now entire franchise gets rings. Old Lesson for all:There are NO SHORTCUTS. NONE."
How I See It: @mowilliams, got the message, man! How great is this!

Steve Nash
"The German is struggling and might not have a monster game but he'll be there when it counts... #forserious."
How I See It: You called it, Steve. Just like old times:

Mario Chalmers
"Tough loss last night but God has a plan for everything. I wanna thank my teammates and all the true fans that stuck wit us. We will b back)"
How I See It: You just made Jason Terry really confused.

Nate Robinson
"Hey tweeps...I made a silly mistake last night...I apologize for my actions, it definitely won't happen again! #WorDaApP"
How I See It: Still pissed at New York?

Hayley Wickenheiser
"Game 7 in Canada, Olympic city, great city....I like Canucks chances"
How I See It: Right, the same city that the police had to break up your gold medal celebration because of underage drinking. Great job, Captain!

Maurice Edu
""her song is the worst song I've ever heard in my life, even deaf people are complaining" <---quote of the day lol @jozyaltidore17"
How I See It: Didn't you guys lose to Panama? Yeah, that's what I thought. Now focus on Guadeloupe.

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Stephon Marbury
"In these days the average adult attention span is 140 characters......…"
How I See It: That's just sad.

Josh Cribbs
"Why am I watching "how to train your dragon" by myself with no kids around lol.."
How I See It: That;s a question for your psychologist, not the Twittersphere.

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James van Riemsdyk
"@ochocinco I have top spin 4, u want to game?"
How I See It: Given the recent events, I think FIFA 11 is more Chad’s speed.

Shaun Phillips
"I'm taking my talents to south beach."
How I See It: Hey, at least his announcement is via Twitter and not national television.

Terrence Williams
"Each sec is a min- Each min is a hour- each hour feels like a month When you really missing someone #wordaapp"
How I See It: What is this, “Inception?”

Brandon McDonald
"I'm hungrier than 12 sumo wrestlers"
How I See It: So does that mean you could eat 12 sumo wrestlers?

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