Chad Ochocinco
"In case of a NFL lockout i'll be a full time model n attach booking n email info to my bio on my profile?My fee=same amount if I was playing"

How I See It: Though this seems ridiculous, the salaries would probably come out close to the same without the fines Chad would get as an NFL player. Unless, of course, you are fined for inappropriate celebrations while modeling.

Chris Johnson
"Mohawk coming soon"

How I See It: Just in from ESPN: "With his new hairstyle, Chris Johnson vows to rush for 2500 yards in 2011!"

Dave Zabriskie
"I just shattered the kitchen table...oops...clean up time."

How I See It: Hate when that happens.

James Harden
"Who's a better duo? LiL Wayne & Drake or Jay-Z and Kayne??????"

How I See It: This is like comparing Westbrook and KD to Lebron and Wade--Wayne and Drake are not there yet.

DeJuan Blair
"PEOPLE KILL ME SMGDH!!! FAM and FRIENDS I HATE WEN PEOPLE TRY TO FIT N!!! B URSELF U WILL GO FARTHER U KEEP WORRYING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE SMH!"

How I See It: I like this. Probably the only attitude to have when you are fighting through knees without ACL's.

Reggie Miller
"Abt to watch a taping of the Oprah Show, so excited.. Go ahead O!!!!!!"

How I See It: And now we know where Miller gets all of his expert analysis from.

Terrence Williams
"Food call of duty for a hour then a nap before my game #wordaapp"

How I See It: It's amazing how Williams isn't playing better with such a functional pre-game routine.