When BYU takes the field Saturday at Camp Randall Stadium, only two things are for certain: A Wisconsin victory and a Sunday morning hangover fit to kill a full grown bull for almost every Badger fan in attendance.
Brigham Young is a good school with a good football team. The Cougars have, however, forgotten the most important part of being great at anything: Having fun.
For a clinic on how to have fun, look no further than Badger nose guard Beau Allen. When he isn't on Twitter looking for a date to bring him whatever the seasonal shake at McDonalds is, he's hitting ball carriers with a big smile on his face.
Arguably the best running back duo in the country, Melvin Gordon (8.7 yards per carry) and James White (6.3 yards per carry) have combined for 1,878 yards and 20 touchdowns this season. And they have perfected a touchdown dance that has become so popular that James Starks and Eddie Lacy of the Packers mimicked their moves on Monday Night Football.
Standout linebacker Chris Borland is also returning this week for the Badgers following a hamstring injury two weeks ago, and you can bet the best part of his day is going to be flattening quarterback Taysom Hill on a blitz. He's recorded 57 tackles this season. He has also completed a pass, and the legend of Borland even says before getting hurt against Illinois two weeks ago, he was set to kick long field goals for Wisconsin. Is there anything this dude can't do?
You can't create characters like these without the occasional deviant situation. Young men must be allowed to experiment and find their limits, both in life and in football, and that's something nobody with a restriction on hair length and coffee consumption will have.
The University of Wisconsin is king of various Internet rankings, such as "No. 1 Party School," "Best Gameday Atmosphere" or "Hottest Students." Most of them aren't far off base. School spirit at Wisconsin is more contagious than smallpox.
You see, the general debauchery surrounding game day in Madison is surely going to be enough to deter more than one staunch follower of the BYU Honor Code from making the trek north to Camp Randall, meaning the historic stadium will be filled with an inordinate amount of red and white.
Many point to quarterback Taysom Hill as the savior of Cougar football, and rightly so. He is on the verge of being just the 22nd player in college football history to throw for 2,000 yards and run for 1,000. That's no small feat.
But BYU relies on a high-tempo offense with numerous checks and audibles, making a clear home field advantage for the Badgers all the more important. Northwestern coaches and players were vocal about how the atmosphere in Camp Randall made it difficult to change things on the fly, and that's only going to get worse for a team whose fans' travel and cultural distance from Madison is exponentially greater.