1. Abstinence All-Stars

NBA news is hard to come by nowadays, and that's hurt me dearly. So I couldn't pass up this virginal rap banger from David Robinson, A.C. Green and Barry Sanders. You couldn't make this up.

2. If A Game Happens And Nobody Sees It ...

Did the game really happen? That's the question I'd be asking if not for this snapshot of the Reds-Marlins doubleheader.

3. Phillipian Slip

Fulham defender Philippe Senderos may be embarrassed, but I'm comforted to know that even the British have a dirty sense of humor. On live TV at that. The Admiral is in the audience, shaking his head softly in disapproval.

4. Good Sport

While I refuse to call him by his Spanglish last name, Chad (formerly Johnson) is one of my favorite athletes. He has fun, goes across the middle more than Frogger, and does things like this. That huge hit he took from a Bucs rookie safety recently? He promised to pay the kid's fine if the league dinged him, which it did Wednesday for $20K. Chad says he is keeping his promise.

5. Dream Shatterer

Hakeem Olajuwon is my favorite center ever. Just an incredible player -- he's Top 5 all-time in steals. No, really. My lasting image is of him Dream Shaking his way to some titles during the Jordan void. The Dream lost a Finals that nobody talks about though. It was to the '86 Celtics, but an L is an L, Hakeem.

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