1. A Tribute To White Chocolate

Jason Williams finally made the news for normal reasons this week. To spice up his notice of retirement, complex.com compiled some of his top on-the-court moments. However, you've got to wonder how much Bryant would be fined for his response to the megafan.

2. Warning To All NHLers ...

To whom it may concern, if you are fortunate enough to hoist the Stanley Cup, don't let this happen. And if it does, remember, super glue is not nearly as visible as tape.

3. The Two Sides Of Derrick Rose

Rose may be about to become one of the least talked about MVPs in NBA history. For those of you who may not know much about the Chicago point guard, The Onion has you covered.

4. Hillis Or Vick To Grace Madden Cover

The final matchup in the fan's bracket that will determine who will be on the cover of Madden12 raises two questions. One, can Cleveland withstand another curse? And two, how many people are voting for Vick solely in hopes that the curse will deal the same fractured fibula it caused the last time he received the "honor"?

5. Most Intellectual Tirade In NHL History

Just as John Tortorella highlighted in his recent response to Bruce Boudreau's whining, this clip also depicts the Rangers' coach's incredible ability to keep his cool. If I had to pick one coach that will never have a YouTube-worthy tirade, it'd be this guy.