An average person might choose to air their dirty laundry, or preferably they just shut up and wash it. But if you're Derek Jeter, and you know the market demand for your sweaty garments is at an all-time high, you know better than to wash your clothes.
No, you put them up for sale.
The memorabilia seller Steiner Sports has a wide range of Derek Jeter items currently up for sale on its website, allowing the company to cash in fully on the last days of Jeter's professional baseball career. Perhaps the most notable of its offerings is a game-worn sock -- that's just one sock, not a pair -- for the reasonable retail price of $409.99.
"This Derek Jeter product is guaranteed authentic," reports the product listing, in case you were worried that it might be soaked in someone else's sweat.
Socks are just one of many sweat-bearing pieces of Jeter memorabilia currently available on the website, although they appear to be the most reasonably priced item -- odd, considering the average foot contains more than 25,000 sweat glands and produces about one cup of sweat per day.
Socks, meanwhile, are notably absorbent, so you're probably getting more sweat for your buck with a $400 sock than you might with, say, an $850 batting glove, which Jeter only wears for a few minutes at a time. How much sweat could there be in a stupid glove?