About 10 feet from every television this Sunday will be a table with all the usual suspects; a gluttony of man food thatâ€™s about as appealing to most women as varicose veins.
After the first quarter of the Super Bowl, the cheese dip starts to form an impenetrable skin. The chicken wings have gone soggy. The bowl of chips is already staling. The only thing worse than the ubiquitous spread is having to watch your husband or boyfriend make repeated trips to this decaying buffet.
But have no fear, gentlemen. Weâ€™ve got some advice for you from Sarah and Ingrid Harbaugh.
Yes, of those Harbaughs.
"You get sick of all the man food," says Sarah, who's married to 49ers head coach Jim Harbaugh. "We go through the whole season, Sunday after Sunday, of chicken wings, pizza and subs."
Since nearly 70 percent of women in the country will be watching the game, the sisters-in-law believe the game day menu should be a little more female friendly. Sarah lightens up a family recipe for chicken enchilada dip and eschews the chips in favor of better dipping options, like carrots.
Ingrid, the wife of Ravens head coach John Harbaugh, agrees most parties should scale back on the fat and calorie heavy foods.
"We make what we call Grandma Miller dip," she says. "We use 1/3 less fat or fat free cream cheese, and stir in worcestershire sauce, Tabasco, green onions and olives. We serve it with veggies or pretzels. It is awesome."
Sarah and Ingrid also suggest helping the wives and girlfriends with the shopping and setup -- don't roll your eyes now! -- and if youâ€™re having a bunch of guys over, make it pot luck. But donâ€™t forget about dessert. Just because youâ€™re stuffed by halftime, doesnâ€™t mean the ladies donâ€™t want a little something sweet in the fourth quarter.
"Iâ€™m a chocoholic," Ingrid says. "I think a lot of women are looking for the chocolate."
The sisters-in-law have teamed up with Skinny Cow to promote their new chocolate candy, which they say will definitely be on their tables for the big game. The families, still stung from their championship week losses, will be watching from home.
"We'll be in Baltimore," Ingrid says. "Weâ€™re not going to the game. We made a pact between us that if weâ€™re not playing in it, weâ€™re not going."
The Super Bowl would've been an amazing achievement for the brothers, but facing off against a sibling is never easy. The Ravens and 49ers already went head to head once this year.
"They truly are best friends," Sarah says. "It's hard when they have to play each other, but that's one day and then you're back to being friends."
"You feel bad because they don't get to see each other so much," Ingrid adds. "They do talk on the phone a lot though."
John and Jim are only about a year apart in age and look similar, but their wives say their personalities are pretty opposite.
"If there's a brick wall in front of both of them," Sarah says, "John will find a hundred different ways around it and Jim will just run through it."
No word on how they will scheme for Sunday's Super Bowl spread, but if they want to keep their wives happy, I'd forego any nuclear orange cheese and draw up a run for some chocolate.
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